In college I was sort of proud of how well I flirted with guys.
I thought that skill would come in handy in marriage but I realized that once married, flirting with my husband would quickly get him turned on and he would want to have sex.
Of course, at the time I had no idea of the damage it was doing.
I just thought that marriage was going to be one big sacrifice in the romance/sex department. He wanted me to lock up his manhood in a small cage. On the one hand we have my angelic little romance fantasies and on the other his dark, medieval kinky fantasy. I was already frustrated with our sex life so when I heard the inner desires of his heart, I freaked out.
He has since grown out of his quiet awkward phase and by the time I met him in college he was a smooth, confident man.
He is now a manager over many people at a high-stakes company.
We've all experienced it to some degree at some point in our lives.
When the person we are infatuated with walks in the room, we freeze up, we can't think or talk, we start to sweat and blush and it's intensely pleasurable and painful at the same time.
I felt pretty silly at freaking out and I decided to give an earnest attempt at understanding my man. It took some convincing because he was hurt by how I reacted the last time.I like sex, don't get me wrong, but I'm not always in the mood or ready for it.From my perspective, sometimes kissing can just be kissing, but not for my husband.We're conservative and religious and we're both very supportive of science, education, the arts and positive community projects.I consider myself to have a healthy sex drive but, unsurprisingly, my husband's sex drive has always been higher than mine.There's no hiding your desires anymore so let's just go forward." I told him about my online conversations and read him all the comments I had received.